There were a few other ladies who were pregnant the same time I was at work, due dates seperated by mere weeks. These ladies have continued on with their pregnancies (thank the Lord) and are about to pop~ which is a daily reminder of where I should be in life. I overhear conversations of lower back pain, and what their last doctor's appointments were like, and how they are doing their last minute preparations to get ready for their new addition. I am so happy for them (REALLY!) but it still is extremely difficult to not want to run to the bathroom and curl into a ball. I would give anything in life (excluding my relationship with God and my dear hottie of a husband) for things to be differently. I can be moved to tears by the simple thoughts of certain outfits that I bought her, or thinking of all the things on our registry at Babies-r-us that we will never get to bring home to our Lily.
This is going to sound ludacris to some, but even when my husband and I go out to eat and we make a toast before having a drink, we say "here's to Lily"....She is the first and last thought of everyday. I desperately miss her.
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2 comments:
Sweetheart, you are up way too early in the morning. Big hugs. Try to get some rest. I hope these next couple of weeks go by quickly. I know you are in pain... just wish I could help.
love you,
E
That has to be so tough seeing and hearing about those pregnancies. You should be in on the conversation instead of suffering the loss of your little girl. Hugs.
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