Thursday, July 23, 2009

Boys are so much easier...

I have been bombarded with mostly great comments since finding out that our new bundle of joy is a boy, but I've gotten one a few times that is really starting to naw at my nerves:

"Oh, you are so lucky because boys are easier than girls!"

Now, this doesn't piss me off when it comes from people that don't know about Lily, but sadly I have gotten this comment more than once from people who know that I'm still grieving for my daughter. UMM, hello?

I wouldn't have cared if she stayed up all night and drove me least she would still be here! Some people that know me really well have been very insightful and that a baby boy for me is probably a good thing because I would constantly comparing this baby if it were a girl to Lily. Thats me~ not that anyone else would do it. If I were to be honest than I would have to say that would be a rather correct assesment. But, regardless, I will always wonder what she would have been like...would she have her daddy's great sense of humor or would she be a light sleeper like me. I will be doing that everyday of my life.

On a lighter note~ I'm trying desperately to find a cute boy onesie that says I love my daddy, and am having no luck. All boy onesies say I love my mommy (which I love!)...let a sister know if you see anything cute :)


Bree said...

Have you tried- cafepress? You can make your own onsies there. I had one made for Ella that said, "my sister is a chocolate lab."

I don't get people's stupid comments. I wish they could find words of comfort that matched the gravity of what we've went through. Most people just don't get it, or say things on a whim without thinking.

Your post makes me think about the fact that I was dying to have a boy when I was pregnant. Now that I've had my girl, all I want is my little girl back. I worry that I'll never have a little girl again. I know this is all so stupid because really, I just want a living baby in my arms.

Did you get Lil's butterfly?

Mirna said...

Yeah, I know what you mean. Lily could never be 'replaced' by any other baby. Of course we would give the world to have them back whether they are healthy or not. Still today, after so many years I wonder how my life would have been different if he was still alive. One will never know.

As a matter of interest: I recon boys are easier. They just grow up themselves LOL! When Gerard was little I wanted to keep him a baby for as long as I could just because I knew he was going to be my last one. Time just flew by! He was too easy. My opinion is that girls are like their mommies: emotional, fussy and sometimes moody LOL! Boys…. Well boys are just boys! They grow up doing everything rough and loud. But they are so gentle with their mommies.

I’ll keep my eyes open for an onesie that says I love my Daddy! How about one that says I am daddy’s kangaroo? Lol! (Here in Oz it’s called a Roo … abbreviate everything!)

Big hugs! :)

Michelle said...

I think people really don't realize what they're saying. In some weird way they're trying to make us feel better or look on the bright side. Whatever. There is no bright side to losing a child. I'm sorry you're dealing with insensitive remarks. :(

Never forgetting Gregory said...

That comment is so inappropriate. I can't believe someone who knows Lily would say that. I feel partially relieved to be having a girl so the experience is different and I won't be comparing everything to what I missed out with Gregory. I will still be thinking about it and missing him, but don't want to ever think that I'm replacing him. I hope you never hear that stupid comment again.