Monday, May 4, 2009

Deja vu?

My family and friends were so sweet last mother's day when they sent me cards and messages wishing me happy mother's day when I was only 10 weeks pregnant or so. I was so touched and I remembered thinking that this would be my last mother's day without a child in my home. Now, I find myself in the same predictment, but in a different sense. I know all of us in deadbabymamaland are dreading this Sunday, and will question God why we are left with empty arms on this most special day for mothers. This is the only day of the year that the world recognizes mothers, but there is no card section for the mothers in our club.

I find myself pregnant with my second child, but the irony is is that I'm a childless mother. My child does not sleep in the nursery that was awaiting her arrival, and her clothes still lay in the dresser with tags still attached.

Will I be added in the mother's day card rotation this year because I am pregnant again or will my status as Lily's mommy be enough?


Beth said...

My mom told me she looked for a mother's day card for me and there just weren't any that fit. You're right, they don't make a section for us! Sunday is going to be a bittersweet day...but mostly sad. :(

Never forgetting Gregory said...

You are a mother to Lily and to this baby. I will certainly be thinking of you and all the other grieving mommies on Mother's Day. Hugs.

Orluna said...

This is one reason I do not send cards and rarely celebrate holidays. For those that are not ecstatic with the world around them, these holidays just pose heartache and frustration, which is why I give cards and gifts when I feel it or when I find that 'something special' for THAT one person, regardless of if it is a holiday or not. It will be sad, hon... and no one is forgetting Lily. You are a mother to two now. Big hugs!

love you