There is a young lady at work (19) that just had a miscarriage. I really want to hug her and support her because I know how isolating losing a baby can be...especially, while everyone else around you appears to be having a great life. She was 12 weeks and had to have a d&c. I overheard her talking about it in hallway, and I wanted to go to her, but stopped. Then, it ocurred to me that maybe that is what people think about with me. They really mean well, but don't want to overstep any boundaries.
I thought about making a card and just writing in the card that when she's ready to talk then my door is always open. She was so happy about being pregnant because she just got married on New Years day, and her new husband just went to Iraq. She has so much on her plate for someone so young.
Its amazing how protective you can become over someone the instant that they enter your sad little club...
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
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5 comments:
I think a hug is always a welcomed gesture and the card is also a great idea. I have someone I work with who has now had 2 miscarriages in a row and is now dealing with infertility. I gave her a hug and told her how sorry I was and I started to cry and told her I know how hard it all is and if she ever needed to talk I am here. You will do the right thing.
I think the card is definitely a good idea. It will show you care and let her know that others understand what she's going through so she doesn't feel so alone. My first pg ended up being a blighted ovum/D&C and it was incredibly painful and isolating for me. I believe delivering my stillborn daughter at 20 weeks was much harder, but there was no way I could have known that at the time. She is so young to deal with so much. It's beautiful that you feel protective over her and want to share your compassion in the midst of your own grief.
Definitely send the card. Great idea and with her husband being away, she might really want to lean on someone who has been through those emotions she is dealing with. I'm sure lots of people have wanted to speak up to you and chose to keep quiet. Everyone loves you. I feel bad for that poor girl.
I think you should give her a card leave it open for her. that way you don't over step or make her feel uncomfortable. Anyways just a thought how sad is that!
I think a card would be a great thing to do...any little gesture is great!
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