Day 17

I guess today's post is going to be a combination of a thankful post and talking about World Prematurity Awarness Day so bear with me...

I started working with the March of Dimes the Spring after Lily died. I was heartbroken and needed to do something in her memory so we did the March for Babies walk and raised $1700. The cool thing was that I had found out that I was pregnant with our rainbow baby just days before the walk. My head and heart were so clouded with still having so much grief for Lily but have shards of hope push through with the thought of having a new baby growing inside of me. Our rainbow baby, Cooper, was born that November and he accompanied us to the walk in 2010. I make it sound so simple but in actuality, my pregnancy with him was life-threatening for both of us. His birth wasn't the happy experience that I always dreamt it would be. He was born at 31 weeks and I didn't even get to see him for 12 hours and didn't get to hold him for 2 days. He spent almost 6 weeks in the nicu and came home on a dreary December day. Actually, it could've been snowing outside but all I saw was my precious and perfect little one, nothing else mattered. Lily never came home in the way we wanted but her little brother did. He doesn't erase her absence but his presence has lifted a lot of the heartache. We've now worked with the MOD for 3 years and have raised more than $6,000.00 and will work with them every year until I am unable to walk anymore myself. Heck, I may still do it but rent a motorized wheelchair!

I talk about both of my babies today. The little baby girl that left us at 23 weeks which has left my heart forever changed and the little baby boy that came into this world with a vigorous cry at 31 weeks.

13 million babies will be born prematurely this year. 1 million of those babies will never come home. 1 in 8 babies will be born prematurely in the United States. We're one of the most developed countries in the world but still 1 in 8 babies will be born too soon.

Today, I am thankful for every single person that helped my son in the nicu. The nurses, doctors, lactation consultants, and those sweet chaplain ladies that helped us bring our sweet boy home. That sweet boy has brought me out of the depths of despair and into the world of the living and happy again.