Unwanted advice is always to come whenever you're expecting a baby and it really didn't get on my nerves when I was pregnant with Lily. It was my first time being pregnant and any tidbit of information was a nugget that I tried to hold in my mind (and, you know how your mind is when you're pregnant!) But, this time around the advice is getting old. What's really pissing me off is people telling me to enjoy bedrest because my life is completely going to change when Cooper arrives. UH, really?
My life was supposed to completely change 9 months ago, but my life changed in an completely opposite direction. I would have loved to stay up all night with a cranky baby. Instead, I cried myself to sleep every night holding onto a teddy bear that the hospital gives parents when their baby dies. I would love to be able to chase around my baby girl thats learning how to crawl. I would love to change her diapers. I am thankful beyond words to have the hope that all these milestones will come into my life when Cooper is born, but for people to act as if I'm not aware of all the changes in my life really gets me. I prayed and cried when those milestones where taken from my life when Lily died...You've never seen a mommy more ready to change diapers, to wipe tears, or lose sleep, than me...or any other dbm thats on the journey to a rainbow baby.
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6 comments:
I give myself pep talks all the time about responding to such comments (which I haven't received. . . yet) I'd love to find a concise way of saying all you just wrote.
I hated that too. Do these people who are saying "enjoy bedrest" understand how physically painful it is. Ugh.
This is so true. The other night we were frustrated because Eleanor wouldn't stop crying, and I turned to Hunter and said, "We should be thankful for every cry she makes." He said, "I KNOW." I think we both have a lot more patience with her crying than we would if we hadn't lost Ada.
I can imagine how that must feel now. After loosing Jonathan I find myself cringing and ready to scream everytime I hear someone complain about staying up with their baby or changing their diaper as I would have given anything to have any of those experiances. People who haven't lost a child just have no clue.
Hmm don't we all know those kind of 'advice'? I think they mean well but they don't think. Which is worse? Hugs to you :)
Yeah, that's annoying. I cringed to hear those silly comments, especially the "are you sure about this" from other parents. Yes, I have wanted this my whole life and am still grieving the fact that it was violently ripped away from me as I watched my baby die. Grrr. The great thing - is that once that baby gets here it is much easier to let peoples' naive comments roll off of you. I'm excited things are still going well for you.
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