Becky's I believe video

Through the babyloss community, I was blessed to meet Becky. She and her hubby lost their first baby, Liam, during fetal surgery to correct his severe Spina Bifida. They were blessed to become pregnant with their daughter, Evelynn, but Becky suffered a Uterine Rupture (most of you know that we lost Lily to a UR, as well) 6 days before her scheduled c-section. Evelynn was pulled off life-support a few days after her birth and passed away.

 This family has been through more than any of us could even imagine! They're currently in a video contest to win FREE IVF (they're going to use a gestational carrier) and it would mean so much to them (and, me!) if you could take just a moment to vote for their video. Here is the link:

 http://haveababy.com/i-believe-video-contest/

Just look under the I believe video contest and vote for the Rasmussen family (in the Primary section). Please and thank you! 

5th Christmas

Monday marked the 5th time that December 3rd has hit the calendar since Lily died.  December 3rd, 2008 was her due date.  I found the calendar that I kept when I was pregnant with her the other day and December 3rd was circled with just the words "Baby N due!".  Damn, I was so excited for December 3rd (or, thereabouts)...

My facebook status on Monday was "I'll wonder what she'd be like at 4, 14, 24, 34..." and I will.  I'll never be ok that she's not running around my house and drawing on the walls with her little brother.  Never.  Will I enjoy life and keep on trucking on?  Yep but I'll always wish that she were here..

I bought her a new ornament for the tree...