Saturday, December 13, 2008

The wonders of a woman's body...

I was relaxing in the tub last night and my hands (still) instinctively rub my stomach. Which got me to thinking about all that my body has been through this year. I haven't been real good with losing weight since Lily died, but my stomach is not nearly as flat as it used to be, which wouldn't have been such a bad thing if I could've had my baby here with me. Excuse me~ and most of you mamas will agree~ my "girlfriends" will never be the same... the other day our receptionist at work was kidding around about spilling water on her shirt and she said "I'm not really lactating"...and for whatever reason the wind was knocked out of my sails for a milli-second. When I got home from the hospital my "girlfriends" were absoultely enormous and I had leaking issues for about 3 weeks. Which again would never have been a problem if I had my baby with me. I was willing to take all of these changes to have a baby in our home. I was willing to accept the widening of my hips...for my boobies to get even more saggy...to go up a shoe size...all to have a baby in our home. I've only listed the changes that can be seen on the outside, for no one can see how my heart has been forever changed.

2 comments:

aimeeeamomof3 said...

i miss you so much!!!!!!!!!!!! i love you so much!it would be great to see you again.

Never forgetting Gregory said...

I thought that was such a cruel joke as well. Why should my breasts work properly to make milk when my body screwed up and my baby was dead. Yuck. And I do understand the changes in both body and heart. My thoughts are with you.