Friday, September 5, 2008

Finally got the question...

So, today I went and had a mani and pedi just to get out of the house. I was seated to a very talkative, but very nice lady who was busy talking away about her kids. I was minding my own business trying not to convey any hate b/c she was in some breaths complaining about her kids, then she asks me "so, do you have any kids?"...Of course, she was just trying to strike up conversation and I didn't want that pity look, so I just answered "yes, but my daughter has passed away, so I don't have any living children." Still got that pity look, but that was the first time that I have been asked that question since Lily passed away...mainly b/c I'm still out on medical leave and don't get out of the house too often. I was surprised that I wasn't overly emotional and I have spent the whole day re-living that moment. Its just so hard, but I have to accept that there are going to be pregnant women and babies born healthy everyday and other mommies are going to ask me questions b/c I'm obviously of childbearing age...slowly but surely is my new mantra.

3 comments:

Mrs. Mother said...

I'm sorry that happened to me. My mom had someone ask her the other day how many grandchildren she had, and she said four. With Jenna, it would have been five. I wanted to say something to her about it, but I didn't. I just want her acknowledged, so I have decided when someone asks, I'm definitely going to tell them about her.

Orluna said...

oh love, i'm sorry. people suck even without meaning to. i love you and continue to say you are one of the strongest women i know.

Jennifer Currey said...

This sounds a lot like my last entry...

It's really hard. I'm so sorry for your loss.